thoughts
Lets talk burnout today. The need to match to the world and its standards has become huge and it is what is leading to Burnout. Burnout does not just arrive one day out of the blue, although for some that’s how it may seem. But there are many stages between the early signs of burnout and the need for a complete sabbatical and medical attention.
In fact, we can avoid such a need by knowing the first stages of early burnout and stopping it before it becomes severe. Scientists have found there are many stages to burnout. Here are the first three.
1. The Compulsion to Prove Oneself - This is especially a danger to those who are determined to make up for other qualities they feel they may lack through simple work ethic. While having a good work ethic is admirable in itself, it may become unbalanced, with the employee continuously pushing themself in order to feel like they have proved themself and earned a place at the table. This, unchecked, leads to the next stage of burnout.
1. The Compulsion to Prove Oneself - This is especially a danger to those who are determined to make up for other qualities they feel they may lack through simple work ethic. While having a good work ethic is admirable in itself, it may become unbalanced, with the employee continuously pushing themself in order to feel like they have proved themself and earned a place at the table. This, unchecked, leads to the next stage of burnout.
2. Working Harder - The
compulsion to prove oneself develops into working longer and harder hours. This
can manifest in working nights and weekends even when it’s not necessary. It
can also mean always checking and answering work email even when away from the
office, and not feeling like you can take a break. Think feeling the need to
respond immediately to a work email that comes in at 10pm or when you’re out
with friends. This stage can also show up as thinking about and being
preoccupied by work, even when you’re not there. As work slowly takes over your
life more and more, you slip into the third stage.
3. Neglecting Needs - As you become more burned out and focused on work, this begins to have a negative effect on the rest of your life. One way this stage can show up is in neglecting your physical needs. You might be too exhausted, or decide you are too busy, to go to the gym or to cook. So you feel worse because of a lack of exercise and poor diet. You may also find yourself consuming more alcohol than is normal for you. Another way this stage can appear is in the neglecting of emotional needs. People in this stage of burnout may withdraw from those close to them, failing to connect on an emotional level with those they care about and not setting aside the time for necessary quality time with friends and loved ones. They may also find themselves more irritable and impatient with those close to them.
3. Neglecting Needs - As you become more burned out and focused on work, this begins to have a negative effect on the rest of your life. One way this stage can show up is in neglecting your physical needs. You might be too exhausted, or decide you are too busy, to go to the gym or to cook. So you feel worse because of a lack of exercise and poor diet. You may also find yourself consuming more alcohol than is normal for you. Another way this stage can appear is in the neglecting of emotional needs. People in this stage of burnout may withdraw from those close to them, failing to connect on an emotional level with those they care about and not setting aside the time for necessary quality time with friends and loved ones. They may also find themselves more irritable and impatient with those close to them.
Resonate with any of these signs? If you believe you may be in early burnout, it’s not too late to put a stop to it and get yourself back into a healthier frame of mind and emotional state. Catching it earlier on means it is a lot easier to rebalance than waiting until burnout progresses to later stages.
Consider hiring a coach. A coach can give you the outside perspective you need to find the all-important balance in your life and to make sure that the changes you make are sustainable for the long term, not just a quick fix. Jaimie Sarah from Definitely Definitely is an Executive Coach with a difference, she invigorates her clients lives from the inside out. Book in a free Strategy Session & see if coaching can help you find balance in your work & life.
Self care is not a waste of time. Although it may seem counterintuitive to take time from work when you feel there is so much to do, taking time for yourself can actually help you to be more productive when you are able to approach work feeling rested and not stressed all the time.
Take real breaks. That doesn’t mean scrolling through your phone for five minutes while pretending to work. Use your lunch break. Use your vacation time. Basically do things that make you happy like going in the fields or visiting your favourite flower shop or having a cup of tea. Schedule time you won’t be working, and then stick to them.
Prioritize yourself. Take the time for regular workouts and to eat healthy food. Take a long shower and don’t feel bad about it.
There is so much online hype about hustling & working 24 / 7 to make your dreams come true and it is easy to understand why entrepreneurs, bloggers & business owners think the way to get what they want is to double down.
This is counter intuitive and does not lead to sustainable growth, health or a fulfilled and happy life. So if you do resonate with anything here, please consider rebalancing, taking some time out, and if you can have a break away from your computer.
Hope this was helpful, thank you for stopping by, see you with my next.
Love
Chichi
3 Signs Of Early Stage Burnout + Simple Self Care Steps
Lets talk burnout today. The need to match to the world and its standards has become huge and it is what is leading to Burnout. Burnout does not just arrive one day out of the blue, although for some that’s how it may seem. But there are many stages between the early signs of burnout and the need for a complete sabbatical and medical attention.
In fact, we can avoid such a need by knowing the first stages of early burnout and stopping it before it becomes severe. Scientists have found there are many stages to burnout. Here are the first three.
1. The Compulsion to Prove Oneself - This is especially a danger to those who are determined to make up for other qualities they feel they may lack through simple work ethic. While having a good work ethic is admirable in itself, it may become unbalanced, with the employee continuously pushing themself in order to feel like they have proved themself and earned a place at the table. This, unchecked, leads to the next stage of burnout.
1. The Compulsion to Prove Oneself - This is especially a danger to those who are determined to make up for other qualities they feel they may lack through simple work ethic. While having a good work ethic is admirable in itself, it may become unbalanced, with the employee continuously pushing themself in order to feel like they have proved themself and earned a place at the table. This, unchecked, leads to the next stage of burnout.
2. Working Harder - The
compulsion to prove oneself develops into working longer and harder hours. This
can manifest in working nights and weekends even when it’s not necessary. It
can also mean always checking and answering work email even when away from the
office, and not feeling like you can take a break. Think feeling the need to
respond immediately to a work email that comes in at 10pm or when you’re out
with friends. This stage can also show up as thinking about and being
preoccupied by work, even when you’re not there. As work slowly takes over your
life more and more, you slip into the third stage.
3. Neglecting Needs - As you become more burned out and focused on work, this begins to have a negative effect on the rest of your life. One way this stage can show up is in neglecting your physical needs. You might be too exhausted, or decide you are too busy, to go to the gym or to cook. So you feel worse because of a lack of exercise and poor diet. You may also find yourself consuming more alcohol than is normal for you. Another way this stage can appear is in the neglecting of emotional needs. People in this stage of burnout may withdraw from those close to them, failing to connect on an emotional level with those they care about and not setting aside the time for necessary quality time with friends and loved ones. They may also find themselves more irritable and impatient with those close to them.
3. Neglecting Needs - As you become more burned out and focused on work, this begins to have a negative effect on the rest of your life. One way this stage can show up is in neglecting your physical needs. You might be too exhausted, or decide you are too busy, to go to the gym or to cook. So you feel worse because of a lack of exercise and poor diet. You may also find yourself consuming more alcohol than is normal for you. Another way this stage can appear is in the neglecting of emotional needs. People in this stage of burnout may withdraw from those close to them, failing to connect on an emotional level with those they care about and not setting aside the time for necessary quality time with friends and loved ones. They may also find themselves more irritable and impatient with those close to them.
Resonate with any of these signs? If you believe you may be in early burnout, it’s not too late to put a stop to it and get yourself back into a healthier frame of mind and emotional state. Catching it earlier on means it is a lot easier to rebalance than waiting until burnout progresses to later stages.
Consider hiring a coach. A coach can give you the outside perspective you need to find the all-important balance in your life and to make sure that the changes you make are sustainable for the long term, not just a quick fix. Jaimie Sarah from Definitely Definitely is an Executive Coach with a difference, she invigorates her clients lives from the inside out. Book in a free Strategy Session & see if coaching can help you find balance in your work & life.
Self care is not a waste of time. Although it may seem counterintuitive to take time from work when you feel there is so much to do, taking time for yourself can actually help you to be more productive when you are able to approach work feeling rested and not stressed all the time.
Take real breaks. That doesn’t mean scrolling through your phone for five minutes while pretending to work. Use your lunch break. Use your vacation time. Basically do things that make you happy like going in the fields or visiting your favourite flower shop or having a cup of tea. Schedule time you won’t be working, and then stick to them.
Prioritize yourself. Take the time for regular workouts and to eat healthy food. Take a long shower and don’t feel bad about it.
There is so much online hype about hustling & working 24 / 7 to make your dreams come true and it is easy to understand why entrepreneurs, bloggers & business owners think the way to get what they want is to double down.
This is counter intuitive and does not lead to sustainable growth, health or a fulfilled and happy life. So if you do resonate with anything here, please consider rebalancing, taking some time out, and if you can have a break away from your computer.
Hope this was helpful, thank you for stopping by, see you with my next.
Love
Chichi
Finally the realization that most beautiful pleasures are free. Its a beautiful sunny day in the midlands england and i am sitting in a country pub, its about 18 degrees and the breeze is neither cool nor warm but the sun is strong and people just like me are sitting outside with their drink or book or nothing. I am writing on my laptop and all i can think off is how the most beautiful pleasures of life are free. The sun, the trees, the chirping of the birds, the breeze, the fragrance from the flowers, the sound of the stream nearby, the sight of the shapes and colours of the flowers, the never-ending blanket of the blue sky, etc etc. Realizing how we even forget they exist but how they increase our well being.
Moving from nature to man made simple pleasures that don’t ring a bell but they quietly make it all. The steam from a hot cup of tea and the smell from the brewed tea after a tiring day might get lost in the magnitude of things but they are what make the moment wonderful and relax our senses. The comfort of our bed on a cold day doesn’t stand in the highlight but it is the back reel that makes it possible.
Gratefulness for things like these is my prime emotion at the mo. If you follow me on instagram and see my stories you know how i have been talking about simplicity and the beauty of these simple pleasures. It has brought so much peace into my being, i am almost at no rush of anything becoming more thankful each day for these wonders of joy and content with all that has been bestowed on me. More on that in the next post.
Would love to know your thoughts on the pleasures of life.
Love
Chichi
The most beautiful pleasures are free
Finally the realization that most beautiful pleasures are free. Its a beautiful sunny day in the midlands england and i am sitting in a country pub, its about 18 degrees and the breeze is neither cool nor warm but the sun is strong and people just like me are sitting outside with their drink or book or nothing. I am writing on my laptop and all i can think off is how the most beautiful pleasures of life are free. The sun, the trees, the chirping of the birds, the breeze, the fragrance from the flowers, the sound of the stream nearby, the sight of the shapes and colours of the flowers, the never-ending blanket of the blue sky, etc etc. Realizing how we even forget they exist but how they increase our well being.
Moving from nature to man made simple pleasures that don’t ring a bell but they quietly make it all. The steam from a hot cup of tea and the smell from the brewed tea after a tiring day might get lost in the magnitude of things but they are what make the moment wonderful and relax our senses. The comfort of our bed on a cold day doesn’t stand in the highlight but it is the back reel that makes it possible.
Gratefulness for things like these is my prime emotion at the mo. If you follow me on instagram and see my stories you know how i have been talking about simplicity and the beauty of these simple pleasures. It has brought so much peace into my being, i am almost at no rush of anything becoming more thankful each day for these wonders of joy and content with all that has been bestowed on me. More on that in the next post.
Would love to know your thoughts on the pleasures of life.
Love
Chichi
I am relieved because i no longer run for a particular schedule but i cater to my own flow. Its self help. That said, I dont think i have talked here on the blog about my daily schedule. I don’t have a 9-5 or fixed time job and courtsey travels and priorities in personal life my schedule has been quite eratic for the last year or so. Today i wake up not before 9 am and then the day flows. There are also days where i haven’t got anything done by 12 pm because i have woken at 11.55 am whereas most of the world is done with half their daily chores. Was i upset with such a schedule, well yes i was. Upset i think is a lesser word to describe my state. I tried to change i tried quite hard to get to the worlds schedule of waking up between 6-8, meditate or excerice then get ready and have breakfast before 9 then work then lunch between 12-2 and so on and on. I did succeed a few days but it didn’t become my schedule because my lifestyle is different my priorities are different. Reality is everyone’s home life, and work situation is unique, even though for some the schedules go with the so called general its not literally the same for anyone. Being unhappy with it not being one with the worlds standard neither helped me change it nor did favours to my well being. Till i accepted its ok, to have a different flow. Whatever that is. Whether you want to work out at 8 am or 8pm its fine. whether you write at 12 am or 12 pm its fine. Some people are morning people and some night. Not everybodys productivity peaks in the am. Not everybody’s life priorities lets them peak in the am. And resenting/ not catering to that requirement of natural flow does nothing. So why not go with the natural flow of whats happening in your life instead of fighting it. By doing so things are easier and less stressful. Ignoring the proper times for certain tasks, and instead, doing them at a time that feels good to us is also a method to live well. A secret actually.
Its 3.04 am on the dot as i finish writing this post, it doesn’t bother me that its almost morning and that i should have instead written the post at 3.04 pm during the day. I feel strongly about the uniqueness of every individual and their lives and accepting that and this post is a small introduction to it. More coming up, till then cater to your flow its therapeutic.
Suggested posts - Why emotional honesty is important
Love
Chichi
Its ok to not have a particular schedule
I am relieved because i no longer run for a particular schedule but i cater to my own flow. Its self help. That said, I dont think i have talked here on the blog about my daily schedule. I don’t have a 9-5 or fixed time job and courtsey travels and priorities in personal life my schedule has been quite eratic for the last year or so. Today i wake up not before 9 am and then the day flows. There are also days where i haven’t got anything done by 12 pm because i have woken at 11.55 am whereas most of the world is done with half their daily chores. Was i upset with such a schedule, well yes i was. Upset i think is a lesser word to describe my state. I tried to change i tried quite hard to get to the worlds schedule of waking up between 6-8, meditate or excerice then get ready and have breakfast before 9 then work then lunch between 12-2 and so on and on. I did succeed a few days but it didn’t become my schedule because my lifestyle is different my priorities are different. Reality is everyone’s home life, and work situation is unique, even though for some the schedules go with the so called general its not literally the same for anyone. Being unhappy with it not being one with the worlds standard neither helped me change it nor did favours to my well being. Till i accepted its ok, to have a different flow. Whatever that is. Whether you want to work out at 8 am or 8pm its fine. whether you write at 12 am or 12 pm its fine. Some people are morning people and some night. Not everybodys productivity peaks in the am. Not everybody’s life priorities lets them peak in the am. And resenting/ not catering to that requirement of natural flow does nothing. So why not go with the natural flow of whats happening in your life instead of fighting it. By doing so things are easier and less stressful. Ignoring the proper times for certain tasks, and instead, doing them at a time that feels good to us is also a method to live well. A secret actually.
Its 3.04 am on the dot as i finish writing this post, it doesn’t bother me that its almost morning and that i should have instead written the post at 3.04 pm during the day. I feel strongly about the uniqueness of every individual and their lives and accepting that and this post is a small introduction to it. More coming up, till then cater to your flow its therapeutic.
Suggested posts - Why emotional honesty is important
Love
Chichi
Comparing ourselves or our lives to someone elses is the most ridiculous of things because it breaks the underlying rule of comparison i.e homogeneity. We are all unique and so are our lives and situations. There are not even two people in the world with the same body, mind, soul, upbringing, family, DNA, experiences, work, passions, etc etc. So why even bother comparing. It should not be even said that comparison kills all. Takes happiness away and puts frustration in its place.
Luckily for me i have not got into its trap. Well i wouldn’t say i have never compared myself to anyone but i haven’t been in that state for much time and have been able to zap myself out of it. What helps me? well here they are.
- Understand and consider it 100% true that we do not really know the struggles of other people. So if you find someone with the kind of life that fascinates you remember they have their own struggles and you don’t know how bad they are. There is a big chance that after you learn about the struggle you find your life better off. And you would rather choose your own life than the ‘fascinating life’ full of those struggles.
- Don’t believe anything that you see on social media because people no matter how real they keep it post edited filtered versions of their life. You see those crazy travel pictures in Santorini and wish ah how good is her life. I wish i got to wear what she is wearing and travel to such stunning locales and also get a picture or two. But what you don’t know and see is that for those images one has to be waking up early even on what is supposed to be a holiday, get ready and leave with a few outfits to shoot in a bag ( its heavy). Without having breakfast. Fighting with your partner even, because he is not happy that you turn holidays into work.
- We often are comparing our failures to peoples success. Highlight to back reel. Absurd isn’t it.
- Keep the focus of your life on your self. So when you think, think about what you want to do, what life you want to live, what truly makes you happy, what keeps you inspired, etc. Do not take the focus on what others are doing with their lives.
- Be grateful for the things and people you have in your life. The constant urge for better and better creates restlessness and triggers comparison. Being grateful will always keep you content and happy with what you have and give you inner peace.
- There is nothing called universal perfect. Perfection is what we think is perfect and it does not hold for everyone. So if you really want to look at it you are a perfect person physically, mentally, emotionally. You have the perfect life, family, career, everything because there is no perfect in the world.
- All of us are unique with unique bodies, experiences and thoughts so be confident of yourself. Your uniqueness is your USP! Comparison will make you small, insecure and vulnerable and that is the energy that you will radiate. What a shame isn’t it. Be confident of your unique self and path and remember what is meant for your greatest good will never skip you.
- Accept yourself. The most common comparison women do is comparing their beauty and their body with someone else’s. Remember what i said in point 6. You are just as beautiful and your body just as great as you think it is. In my teenage and most of my 20s i hated my belly fat. My definition of beauty was a girl with a thin waist and i looked at the tiniest waists of models and actreses and that made me feel even worse. So realization came and i accepted my body and trust me it has been the greatest stress relievers of my life. Lol even when i struggled in my mind with my belly fat there were people who told me my body was perfect to them, so you get my point!! If you feel you want to have a certain kind of a body first see the reason you want it. Is it in comparison to someone which should be shunned straight away or for positive reasons like for your health, strength etc.
- The only person you should compare yourself is with the person you were yesterday. So work on your shortcomings, work on the dream life, work on your goals with the aim of out performing your yesterday self and no one else.
- Get inspired but don’t compare. Well there is a very thin line between the two. Often we start with inspiration but move to comparison. Just to spell out the difference inspiration motivates and leads you to pursue your goals in a healthy and positive way whereas comparison demotivates and even though sometimes makes us to pursue goals, does so in a negative way. You never feel content and happy with neither the process nor the achievement.
- Surround yourself with people who clap at your success, inspire you, lift you higher, make you happy and see the greatness in you even when you don’t see it. They add to your well being and indirectly also prevent you from indulging in negative activities like comparison.
What i wore - Trousers, Shoes, Top - Zara
I took these pictures at the stunning St. Aymes cafe London where i had wanted to visit ever since Such a beautiful pretty cafe and i love their cupcakes!! And so instagrammable! Cant wait to go back.
Suggested post - 6 Tips to fight a bad day
Love
Chichi
11 ways to stop comparison to others
Comparing ourselves or our lives to someone elses is the most ridiculous of things because it breaks the underlying rule of comparison i.e homogeneity. We are all unique and so are our lives and situations. There are not even two people in the world with the same body, mind, soul, upbringing, family, DNA, experiences, work, passions, etc etc. So why even bother comparing. It should not be even said that comparison kills all. Takes happiness away and puts frustration in its place.
Luckily for me i have not got into its trap. Well i wouldn’t say i have never compared myself to anyone but i haven’t been in that state for much time and have been able to zap myself out of it. What helps me? well here they are.
- Understand and consider it 100% true that we do not really know the struggles of other people. So if you find someone with the kind of life that fascinates you remember they have their own struggles and you don’t know how bad they are. There is a big chance that after you learn about the struggle you find your life better off. And you would rather choose your own life than the ‘fascinating life’ full of those struggles.
- Don’t believe anything that you see on social media because people no matter how real they keep it post edited filtered versions of their life. You see those crazy travel pictures in Santorini and wish ah how good is her life. I wish i got to wear what she is wearing and travel to such stunning locales and also get a picture or two. But what you don’t know and see is that for those images one has to be waking up early even on what is supposed to be a holiday, get ready and leave with a few outfits to shoot in a bag ( its heavy). Without having breakfast. Fighting with your partner even, because he is not happy that you turn holidays into work.
- We often are comparing our failures to peoples success. Highlight to back reel. Absurd isn’t it.
- Keep the focus of your life on your self. So when you think, think about what you want to do, what life you want to live, what truly makes you happy, what keeps you inspired, etc. Do not take the focus on what others are doing with their lives.
- Be grateful for the things and people you have in your life. The constant urge for better and better creates restlessness and triggers comparison. Being grateful will always keep you content and happy with what you have and give you inner peace.
- There is nothing called universal perfect. Perfection is what we think is perfect and it does not hold for everyone. So if you really want to look at it you are a perfect person physically, mentally, emotionally. You have the perfect life, family, career, everything because there is no perfect in the world.
- All of us are unique with unique bodies, experiences and thoughts so be confident of yourself. Your uniqueness is your USP! Comparison will make you small, insecure and vulnerable and that is the energy that you will radiate. What a shame isn’t it. Be confident of your unique self and path and remember what is meant for your greatest good will never skip you.
- Accept yourself. The most common comparison women do is comparing their beauty and their body with someone else’s. Remember what i said in point 6. You are just as beautiful and your body just as great as you think it is. In my teenage and most of my 20s i hated my belly fat. My definition of beauty was a girl with a thin waist and i looked at the tiniest waists of models and actreses and that made me feel even worse. So realization came and i accepted my body and trust me it has been the greatest stress relievers of my life. Lol even when i struggled in my mind with my belly fat there were people who told me my body was perfect to them, so you get my point!! If you feel you want to have a certain kind of a body first see the reason you want it. Is it in comparison to someone which should be shunned straight away or for positive reasons like for your health, strength etc.
- The only person you should compare yourself is with the person you were yesterday. So work on your shortcomings, work on the dream life, work on your goals with the aim of out performing your yesterday self and no one else.
- Get inspired but don’t compare. Well there is a very thin line between the two. Often we start with inspiration but move to comparison. Just to spell out the difference inspiration motivates and leads you to pursue your goals in a healthy and positive way whereas comparison demotivates and even though sometimes makes us to pursue goals, does so in a negative way. You never feel content and happy with neither the process nor the achievement.
- Surround yourself with people who clap at your success, inspire you, lift you higher, make you happy and see the greatness in you even when you don’t see it. They add to your well being and indirectly also prevent you from indulging in negative activities like comparison.
What i wore - Trousers, Shoes, Top - Zara
I took these pictures at the stunning St. Aymes cafe London where i had wanted to visit ever since Such a beautiful pretty cafe and i love their cupcakes!! And so instagrammable! Cant wait to go back.
Suggested post - 6 Tips to fight a bad day
Love
Chichi
This is a bit of an unusual post. If you follow me on Instagram you know i have been asking questions. Questions that matter. That put sense to life, what is primary, what is secondary. Been up with reading, thinking, asking, finding the what and why's. Basically giving to my true calling ever since i was a child. Wisdom. I'll do a full post on it very soon. But today i am sharing some of my thoughts gained after much debate. Shared on instagram but never here. Some of it is shared on instagram story and present as story highlight on my feed and some are shared via instagram posts but i always use the hashtag #brainheartwork to share and here they are from a couple of months. I call it brain heart work because the thoughts are a product of both mind and heart, haha!!!
1. Things don't work out, people don't work out but whatever is meant for our greatest good 100% works out, the truth of this universe. The dots connect always just sometimes in hindsight.
2. Everyone other that you is a second. Focus on the first, You. Your maximum love and affection should be for yourself and same ways your strongest criticism too. Caress yourself and also impress yourself and truly be your favourite person.
3. Its only worth looking at ourselves, what we are and what we are doing and improve that because none of us are vice / fault free.
4. Surround yourself with real kind and inspiring people because the people around us shape us in more ways than what our conscious self knows, got to be careful.
5. There is no randomness in this world, everything is planned to the T. So if you are running late or plans change or whatever there is reason behind. Sometimes it becomes obvious then and there, sometimes late and there is also a chance that you might never know.
6. Love me or love me not, no value. Love yourself, utmost value.
7. Everything in the world is ok, the problem is we are not ok with it.
8. Your best intentions, actions and emotions are only good for the right person and always short for the wrong person.
You can now already see me sharing my thoughts here on topics that matter to me and i can't be more excited to tell you that there will more posts on thoughts and wisdom here on the blog.
Love
Chichi
BRAIN HEART WORK
This is a bit of an unusual post. If you follow me on Instagram you know i have been asking questions. Questions that matter. That put sense to life, what is primary, what is secondary. Been up with reading, thinking, asking, finding the what and why's. Basically giving to my true calling ever since i was a child. Wisdom. I'll do a full post on it very soon. But today i am sharing some of my thoughts gained after much debate. Shared on instagram but never here. Some of it is shared on instagram story and present as story highlight on my feed and some are shared via instagram posts but i always use the hashtag #brainheartwork to share and here they are from a couple of months. I call it brain heart work because the thoughts are a product of both mind and heart, haha!!!
1. Things don't work out, people don't work out but whatever is meant for our greatest good 100% works out, the truth of this universe. The dots connect always just sometimes in hindsight.
2. Everyone other that you is a second. Focus on the first, You. Your maximum love and affection should be for yourself and same ways your strongest criticism too. Caress yourself and also impress yourself and truly be your favourite person.
3. Its only worth looking at ourselves, what we are and what we are doing and improve that because none of us are vice / fault free.
4. Surround yourself with real kind and inspiring people because the people around us shape us in more ways than what our conscious self knows, got to be careful.
5. There is no randomness in this world, everything is planned to the T. So if you are running late or plans change or whatever there is reason behind. Sometimes it becomes obvious then and there, sometimes late and there is also a chance that you might never know.
6. Love me or love me not, no value. Love yourself, utmost value.
7. Everything in the world is ok, the problem is we are not ok with it.
8. Your best intentions, actions and emotions are only good for the right person and always short for the wrong person.
You can now already see me sharing my thoughts here on topics that matter to me and i can't be more excited to tell you that there will more posts on thoughts and wisdom here on the blog.
Love
Chichi
I was going to write about my trials with success and something happened in the house that changed the topic of the post to why emotional honesty is important. Honesty not just to the world but also to self. They say it shouldn’t show from my demeanor if i am angry or sad. You must have a pleasant face and body language no matter how horrible you feel from inside. Your sufferings are yours and thats where they should be with you. Isn’t that the most ridiculous of things!!! Isn’t that the biggest lie isn’t that just preaching pretence. Shouldn’t every element of my body send the exact message into the world that it truly feels.
I don’t want to give a flying fcuk what people think about me, oh she is upset, oh she is cheerful, oh she didn’t like this. Who cares what they think and certainly certainly not want to give them the illusion of my happiness or sadness which i do not experience. And above all pretence. Its a lie. The problem with this kind of show is that although it starts with others, we begin to lie to ourselves and start hiding our real emotions which in turn leads to hollowness and diseases of heart and mind.
Sometimes people walk up to you and ask you why you look sad or elated or worried. It might be out of concern, because probably they hate to see you in bad mood. but often, it’s also about their expectations out of you in a particular environment. I just said sad it can also be happiness at a time when situation demands to be sad. The cause of the happiness could be anything maybe i found some light inside me even in a sad situation and that has made me happy. But showing that happiness to the world means being judged badly. But seriously why should i care for that judgement it is of no consequence.
I understand sometimes we have to hide our true feelings. For e.g a mother might have a really bad day but has to be cheerful when she meets her child because she wouldn’t want the child to get sad seeing her troubled. But even there a check has to come, the number of times, the extent and also some education to the child to prepare her for the realities of life. And same goes to all relationships to be honest.
I think of it as honesty, wrong info to the world about my emotional state will be a lie just like i wouldn’t want to make wordly and actly lies i wouldn’t want an emotional lie. That is my answer to whosoever tells me to check my expression my body language my demeanor. And i urge each one of us to take this with seriousness, its not society’s expectation that your emotions have to live up to. you can feel what you are feeling and it is great if that shows on your face and through your actions. Just proves that you value truth, you care for self love and you haven’t let the ways of the world override your ways.
I would love to hear your thoughts on emotional honesty. Thank you for stopping by, see you with my next.
Love
Chichi
Why emotional honesty is important
I was going to write about my trials with success and something happened in the house that changed the topic of the post to why emotional honesty is important. Honesty not just to the world but also to self. They say it shouldn’t show from my demeanor if i am angry or sad. You must have a pleasant face and body language no matter how horrible you feel from inside. Your sufferings are yours and thats where they should be with you. Isn’t that the most ridiculous of things!!! Isn’t that the biggest lie isn’t that just preaching pretence. Shouldn’t every element of my body send the exact message into the world that it truly feels.
I don’t want to give a flying fcuk what people think about me, oh she is upset, oh she is cheerful, oh she didn’t like this. Who cares what they think and certainly certainly not want to give them the illusion of my happiness or sadness which i do not experience. And above all pretence. Its a lie. The problem with this kind of show is that although it starts with others, we begin to lie to ourselves and start hiding our real emotions which in turn leads to hollowness and diseases of heart and mind.
Sometimes people walk up to you and ask you why you look sad or elated or worried. It might be out of concern, because probably they hate to see you in bad mood. but often, it’s also about their expectations out of you in a particular environment. I just said sad it can also be happiness at a time when situation demands to be sad. The cause of the happiness could be anything maybe i found some light inside me even in a sad situation and that has made me happy. But showing that happiness to the world means being judged badly. But seriously why should i care for that judgement it is of no consequence.
I understand sometimes we have to hide our true feelings. For e.g a mother might have a really bad day but has to be cheerful when she meets her child because she wouldn’t want the child to get sad seeing her troubled. But even there a check has to come, the number of times, the extent and also some education to the child to prepare her for the realities of life. And same goes to all relationships to be honest.
I think of it as honesty, wrong info to the world about my emotional state will be a lie just like i wouldn’t want to make wordly and actly lies i wouldn’t want an emotional lie. That is my answer to whosoever tells me to check my expression my body language my demeanor. And i urge each one of us to take this with seriousness, its not society’s expectation that your emotions have to live up to. you can feel what you are feeling and it is great if that shows on your face and through your actions. Just proves that you value truth, you care for self love and you haven’t let the ways of the world override your ways.
I would love to hear your thoughts on emotional honesty. Thank you for stopping by, see you with my next.
Love
Chichi
Instagram is certainly the talk of the town at the moment. Every day i see more and more people on the creation side i.e bloggers, influencers even businesses complain about the changing instagram algorithms. And rightly so because some algorithm which you have no clue about decides whether your post should be shown to your followers. Sounds absurd right!! Also offending and a hazard to creativity. How can technology decide the worth of creative content? Its for humans. Not even bothered with the other people how do you not show it to people who have chosen to follow me? They follow because they like my work. Sadly Instagram has a mind of its own and ever since the chronological Instagram feed was changed its become a forever case of struggle with Instagram algorithms.
But first what is this Instagram frenzy? Its turned into a high net worth industry where serious money is being made, great! but if we see its just an app and it was all great and still is if kept to the level of an app. An app for bloggers like me to find audience to share my work with, an app for business to find its customers, an app for people to keep in touch with their friends and family, an app to find inspiration, an app to know whats up in/with the field/people of our liking. All good there, the problems started and what is now being termed as an Instagram bubble, when people started thinking of it as life. Some people started living their lives on instagram some started living for instagram and most believe that life on instagram is true life.
For bloggers it turned from a medium to find audience to share their work and drive traffic to their sites into a medium where they could have power and influence and subsequently monetize that influence. Earlier the content was created for brands and blogs and also shared on social media, instagram being one of them now the content is being created just for Instagram and more and more for it.
Now with all that said here is why we need to grip it and keep our affections for instagarm to the level of a useful app and not even a step further.
- It is an app, its technology, realize. What if a bug comes and it completely crashes. Its no secret that all accounts on instagram get bugged. Cant like, can’t follow, posts not showing on hashtags, etc etc are all bugs and all accounts specially the business accounts go through them. We loose our sleep and mind on those now imagine if the account is completely gone!!!
- Instagram is a business and for every business profit is as much an objective as is creating value. Instagram is no different. So it comes up with changes the so called Instagram algorithms that it thinks will make people spend more time on it aka keep them hooked onto it which translates to more money for Instagram. Now this is the reality that we all need to accept. Instagram is although for us it is also for itself.
- Instagram world is not the real world, it might be close but it is not exactly what goes on in real life. Important for everyone including us on the content side who create for Instagram but still belittle ourselves with comparisons with what we see on other peoples feed. The feed is curated well crafted even i don’t post pictures that don’t go with my feed so hell no.
- For bloggers there are better mediums to drive traffic to their site like Pinterest, Facebook, Twitter, stumble upon, medium and above all the search engines like google, etc.
- Its not a good idea to base your business on a product that is not yours. So if blogging is your business realize that only earning from Instagram is a huge risk. Instagram is gone you are gone. If you are an Instagram influencer branch out.
Also i feel its important that all of us realize our own power, its all in us we are the drivers of Instagram. Today if we close our account it was nothing was it ever anything? Yes it does help us with the promotions for our blogs and businesses hence is part of the game keep it at that don't make it the game. Realize its only an app not reality let alone life and should thus not be taken as one.
Has the Instagram bubble touched you? Hope this post is helpful, thank you for stopping by, see you with my next.
Suggested posts - The pressures of being a content creator
Love
Chichi
Why instagram obsession needs to stop
Instagram is certainly the talk of the town at the moment. Every day i see more and more people on the creation side i.e bloggers, influencers even businesses complain about the changing instagram algorithms. And rightly so because some algorithm which you have no clue about decides whether your post should be shown to your followers. Sounds absurd right!! Also offending and a hazard to creativity. How can technology decide the worth of creative content? Its for humans. Not even bothered with the other people how do you not show it to people who have chosen to follow me? They follow because they like my work. Sadly Instagram has a mind of its own and ever since the chronological Instagram feed was changed its become a forever case of struggle with Instagram algorithms.
But first what is this Instagram frenzy? Its turned into a high net worth industry where serious money is being made, great! but if we see its just an app and it was all great and still is if kept to the level of an app. An app for bloggers like me to find audience to share my work with, an app for business to find its customers, an app for people to keep in touch with their friends and family, an app to find inspiration, an app to know whats up in/with the field/people of our liking. All good there, the problems started and what is now being termed as an Instagram bubble, when people started thinking of it as life. Some people started living their lives on instagram some started living for instagram and most believe that life on instagram is true life.
For bloggers it turned from a medium to find audience to share their work and drive traffic to their sites into a medium where they could have power and influence and subsequently monetize that influence. Earlier the content was created for brands and blogs and also shared on social media, instagram being one of them now the content is being created just for Instagram and more and more for it.
Now with all that said here is why we need to grip it and keep our affections for instagarm to the level of a useful app and not even a step further.
- It is an app, its technology, realize. What if a bug comes and it completely crashes. Its no secret that all accounts on instagram get bugged. Cant like, can’t follow, posts not showing on hashtags, etc etc are all bugs and all accounts specially the business accounts go through them. We loose our sleep and mind on those now imagine if the account is completely gone!!!
- Instagram is a business and for every business profit is as much an objective as is creating value. Instagram is no different. So it comes up with changes the so called Instagram algorithms that it thinks will make people spend more time on it aka keep them hooked onto it which translates to more money for Instagram. Now this is the reality that we all need to accept. Instagram is although for us it is also for itself.
- Instagram world is not the real world, it might be close but it is not exactly what goes on in real life. Important for everyone including us on the content side who create for Instagram but still belittle ourselves with comparisons with what we see on other peoples feed. The feed is curated well crafted even i don’t post pictures that don’t go with my feed so hell no.
- For bloggers there are better mediums to drive traffic to their site like Pinterest, Facebook, Twitter, stumble upon, medium and above all the search engines like google, etc.
- Its not a good idea to base your business on a product that is not yours. So if blogging is your business realize that only earning from Instagram is a huge risk. Instagram is gone you are gone. If you are an Instagram influencer branch out.
Also i feel its important that all of us realize our own power, its all in us we are the drivers of Instagram. Today if we close our account it was nothing was it ever anything? Yes it does help us with the promotions for our blogs and businesses hence is part of the game keep it at that don't make it the game. Realize its only an app not reality let alone life and should thus not be taken as one.
Has the Instagram bubble touched you? Hope this post is helpful, thank you for stopping by, see you with my next.
Suggested posts - The pressures of being a content creator
Love
Chichi
Content my most frequently used word but also a word i am slowly becoming not a fan of. Chichi what are you saying you are a content creator!! Yes i am, the pictures for my blog, instagram and brands, the posts i write and the captions i use, all content and i take it very seriously but it has made me into a zombie of looking at everything from the point of view of use and share sooner or later.
A constant case of photo taking, capturing every moment even the minutest. Not just moments that are happening but creating moments for use. How does that sound? It was said you are not really experiencing the moment if you are trying to capture it through a lens, well this is not through the lens but for the lens. Although we are living in an age where anything not shot and shared with the world hasn’t really happened even the people who call themselves very private share when they travel to a new place or whatever that they find happening be it through pictures on instagram, Facebook and the likes or now stories. Imagine the pressure on a content creator, its tremendous to say the least. We get seriously disappointed if we haven’t taken good/ enough pictures of any experience. Our happiness potion depends not on the experience but with the content that we have created out of that. Every place i go to and every person i meet is looked from the point of view of content. If not for the blogpost, for instagram and if not for that maybe story, its out of hand. Sometimes i feel its a waste of money and time if i am not able to take enough share worthy or call instagram worthy pictures. And this is life i am talking about, everyday life.
Lets take this day for e.g. pictures shot at beautiful Aubaine selfridges. Me and my lovely friend Zahra planned to have breakfast at Aubaine not because we love breakfast at aubaine but because it is extremely beautiful and photographs come as dreamy as they get. Nothing wrong till here, most girls think this way these days. Now we planned to reach a little early so we can find the place empty, perfect setting for photo ops. I was running 10 mins late for some reason i don’t remember now, i should confess that more than making Zahra wait i was worried about the place getting filled which translates to missed photo ops. Luckily for us it wasn’t as full and an instagram savy couple cleared a table so we could take the best shots, shots you see here. But man the stressful state i was in, fear that i might not be able to capture something as imagined. Well Zahra was pissed at me too, but not just because she had to wait for me but also infact more because our photo taking wouldn’t go as per plan. I find it sad that making my friend wait was less of a guilt.
Holidays is taken to another level, at the mo i feel i haven’t had a holiday in like forever. Ok Chichi you have been to so many, we know. Well yes but i have been working on all, my mind has worked throughout finding the best spots and capturing each experience to the fullest on film. I haven’t even for a day zoomed out of the process, let alone relax and chill. What holidays are meant to be.
We used to go to restaurants, order and eat our food. Now we go to restaurants and no matter how hungry we start by first taking pictures of our table or the restaurant. Then the food comes we have specifically asked it to bring it all together so we can take pictures, good pictures, picture taking starts from every damn angle and then some boomerang and now for vlogs and stories some video. Its been 20 mins or more and the chips have become all soggy, the toast is no more crisp and the tea is cold. But we eat and drink without complain like its the most delicious meal ever because we have to make a video of how much we enjoy our food.
If your companion to the restaurant or holiday or wherever happens to be a blogger you are still ok, but if its your boyfriend or husband or brother or sister or friend you have annoyed them to hell. Imagine on a holiday you are at a beautiful sunset point and all you do is take pictures or make videos of it and then ask your partner to do the same with you in those pictures and videos, the plight of the partner. Vaibhav told me 2 years back he doesn't want to go on holidays if its only obsessed with blog and social media. Totally get that!!
The case of our time is we want to see everything and we want to show everything, its FOMO too.
At this point i feel i owe it to the people who follow me to keep it interested, entertained and inspired. They follow me for those things and i should feed them that and constant picture taking ensures i never run out.
Having said everything i believe life is about memories and not everything can be content. Like the walks with my partner, the mad laughs with my sisters, maybe i can pick my phone and capture 15 seconds of it but i shouldnt and actually can’t capture all the seconds of those 2 or whatever hours. As a content creator / blogger finding the work life balance is extremely hard but extremely critical for our sanity.
I started writing this post in Delhi and as luck would have it, finishing it in Benares- the spiritual capital of India. The city that is older than history, older than tradition, even older than legend and looks double as old as all those combined. A dream for a content creator and well i have reached for my phone for videos and pictures but capturing has not been my first and last and only emotion!! The bigger picture matters more than any frame, sealed in the land of mediation and liberation, Varanasi.
Would love to know your thoughts, see you with my next.
Love
Chichi
The pressures of being a content creator
Content my most frequently used word but also a word i am slowly becoming not a fan of. Chichi what are you saying you are a content creator!! Yes i am, the pictures for my blog, instagram and brands, the posts i write and the captions i use, all content and i take it very seriously but it has made me into a zombie of looking at everything from the point of view of use and share sooner or later.
A constant case of photo taking, capturing every moment even the minutest. Not just moments that are happening but creating moments for use. How does that sound? It was said you are not really experiencing the moment if you are trying to capture it through a lens, well this is not through the lens but for the lens. Although we are living in an age where anything not shot and shared with the world hasn’t really happened even the people who call themselves very private share when they travel to a new place or whatever that they find happening be it through pictures on instagram, Facebook and the likes or now stories. Imagine the pressure on a content creator, its tremendous to say the least. We get seriously disappointed if we haven’t taken good/ enough pictures of any experience. Our happiness potion depends not on the experience but with the content that we have created out of that. Every place i go to and every person i meet is looked from the point of view of content. If not for the blogpost, for instagram and if not for that maybe story, its out of hand. Sometimes i feel its a waste of money and time if i am not able to take enough share worthy or call instagram worthy pictures. And this is life i am talking about, everyday life.
Lets take this day for e.g. pictures shot at beautiful Aubaine selfridges. Me and my lovely friend Zahra planned to have breakfast at Aubaine not because we love breakfast at aubaine but because it is extremely beautiful and photographs come as dreamy as they get. Nothing wrong till here, most girls think this way these days. Now we planned to reach a little early so we can find the place empty, perfect setting for photo ops. I was running 10 mins late for some reason i don’t remember now, i should confess that more than making Zahra wait i was worried about the place getting filled which translates to missed photo ops. Luckily for us it wasn’t as full and an instagram savy couple cleared a table so we could take the best shots, shots you see here. But man the stressful state i was in, fear that i might not be able to capture something as imagined. Well Zahra was pissed at me too, but not just because she had to wait for me but also infact more because our photo taking wouldn’t go as per plan. I find it sad that making my friend wait was less of a guilt.
Holidays is taken to another level, at the mo i feel i haven’t had a holiday in like forever. Ok Chichi you have been to so many, we know. Well yes but i have been working on all, my mind has worked throughout finding the best spots and capturing each experience to the fullest on film. I haven’t even for a day zoomed out of the process, let alone relax and chill. What holidays are meant to be.
We used to go to restaurants, order and eat our food. Now we go to restaurants and no matter how hungry we start by first taking pictures of our table or the restaurant. Then the food comes we have specifically asked it to bring it all together so we can take pictures, good pictures, picture taking starts from every damn angle and then some boomerang and now for vlogs and stories some video. Its been 20 mins or more and the chips have become all soggy, the toast is no more crisp and the tea is cold. But we eat and drink without complain like its the most delicious meal ever because we have to make a video of how much we enjoy our food.
If your companion to the restaurant or holiday or wherever happens to be a blogger you are still ok, but if its your boyfriend or husband or brother or sister or friend you have annoyed them to hell. Imagine on a holiday you are at a beautiful sunset point and all you do is take pictures or make videos of it and then ask your partner to do the same with you in those pictures and videos, the plight of the partner. Vaibhav told me 2 years back he doesn't want to go on holidays if its only obsessed with blog and social media. Totally get that!!
The case of our time is we want to see everything and we want to show everything, its FOMO too.
At this point i feel i owe it to the people who follow me to keep it interested, entertained and inspired. They follow me for those things and i should feed them that and constant picture taking ensures i never run out.
Having said everything i believe life is about memories and not everything can be content. Like the walks with my partner, the mad laughs with my sisters, maybe i can pick my phone and capture 15 seconds of it but i shouldnt and actually can’t capture all the seconds of those 2 or whatever hours. As a content creator / blogger finding the work life balance is extremely hard but extremely critical for our sanity.
I started writing this post in Delhi and as luck would have it, finishing it in Benares- the spiritual capital of India. The city that is older than history, older than tradition, even older than legend and looks double as old as all those combined. A dream for a content creator and well i have reached for my phone for videos and pictures but capturing has not been my first and last and only emotion!! The bigger picture matters more than any frame, sealed in the land of mediation and liberation, Varanasi.
Would love to know your thoughts, see you with my next.
Love
Chichi
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)